Do You Seek Happiness or Pleasure?
January 23, 2009
A critical part of the journey to inner peace is the understanding that seeking pleasure is not the same as seeking happiness. Socrates said, “The beginning of wisdom is the definition of terms.†Let’s define what it is we are really seeking.
Pleasure is temporary enjoyment. When something happens, we feel good; when it is no longer happening, we look forward to feeling that way again. Pleasure is dependent on some other condition being present (the chocolate cake, the thrill ride, the fabulous kisser, the exotic island, the forbidden lover). When that condition is absent, we feel dissatisfied. Pleasure-seeking becomes a roller coaster of amazingly exhilarating peaks and depressingly unexciting troughs.
Happiness is a lasting state of contentment that is not dependent on any external factor. It is the absence of suffering, even when faced with difficult circumstances. Happiness is a personal choice to shift our perspective and view every situation in the best possible light.
Just as our happiness does not depend on external circumstances, we cannot find lasting happiness outside of ourselves. The “right†clothes, car, job, friends, or partner won’t make us happy. We can only make ourselves happy. The good thing about that is, when we find that happy place that is completely independent of anything or anyone, it cannot be taken away from us.
Viktor Frankl was a Holocaust concentration camp survivor who wrote a wonderful book about his ordeal called Man’s Search for Meaning
Pleasure seeking is living FOR the moment, with no regard for long term consequences. Often, giving in to these desires directly sabotages our efforts of finding lasting happiness. On the other hand, happiness is living IN the moment, without concerns about past sufferings or future worries. Every decision we make gets us closer to, or further from, our goal. When we live fully in the moment, it makes no difference what happens around us or to us; we will maintain our inner peace.
For further reading on this distinction, I highly recommend the Dalai Lama’s The Art of Happiness
Another, more philosophical, discussion of the subject is Søren Kierkegaard’s Purity of Heart Is to Will One Thing
So, what is it you seek:Â momentary pleasure or lasting happiness?
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Lasting happiness is definitely my goal, but I haven’t completely risen above momentary pleasures. It’s no easy task.
The problem for me isn’t just pleasure, it’s pain too. It took me awhile to realize that being happy is not the same as being without pain, and that being without pain is not the same as being happy. There’s a great saying by Rajinder Singh:
In this world,
sickness and pain
are inevitable;
suffering is optional.
As you’ve aptly pointed out in this post, we have the option to choose happiness, but we have to be willing to live IN the moment.
Thanks again for another great post!
Hi, Michael! It’s so nice to see you back here.
My take on this is that my goal is lasting happiness so I don’t want to pursue any short term pleasures that would sabotage my long term goal.
However, there are many pleasures that I can and will enjoy without detracting from my happiness or the happiness of others… a walk in the woods, building a sand castle at the beach, or reading a good book while sipping a full-bodied Darjeeling. In fact I think these simple pleasures enhance our experience of lasting happiness.
Lisis