5 Steps to Finding Fulfillment
February 11, 2009
In 1943 Abraham Maslow proposed his now famous Hierarchy of Needs pyramid, creating a whole new movement of humanistic psychology. In essence, he concluded that deficiency needs must be met before personal growth needs can be fulfilled. He defines deficiency needs as: physiological, safety, love and belonging, and esteem, in that order. Once these lower levels of the pyramid have been provided for, we can move on to satisfy our growth and development needs of self-actualization; we can focus on finding happiness. If you are the curious or academic sort, I encourage you to read more about it in Toward a Psychology of Being
Here’s where my Quest for Balance comes in: I have found a shortcut to the top of the pyramid. If you spend less time and energy on the lower need levels, you will be able to spend more of your lifetime in the higher levels. I have shifted my priorities and redesigned my life so that I can want less, and enjoy more. If we assume it is true that we must meet our deficiency needs before pursuing self-actualization, then there are a couple of ways to go about doing this:
1. Work really hard to get everything you and your family could possibly want today and in the future. This is what the Joneses are doing, and you could try to keep up with them. Warning: if you choose this approach, you will spend a significant amount of time trying to meet your (and the Joneses’) idea of deficiency needs.
2. Alternately, you could want LESS stuff than they do, today and for the future, so that you could work less and live more. If you go this route, you’ll spend so little time on issues of food, clothing, and shelter that you will have to spend a lot of time either pursuing or enjoying happiness. This is not for the faint of heart. You would have to let go of all the excuses, obstacles, and toxic personalities that surround you and just enjoy life. Crazy concept, I know.
It all comes down to how you want to spend the majority of your time. In my case, I don’t want to spend much time at all thinking about anything that doesn’t directly contribute to my happiness. I understand that I have basic survival needs (food, clothing, shelter,) but that is all they are. Once I meet those, as simply as possible, I can be free… free to live, explore, create, and enjoy.
So my redesigned hierarchy looks more like an inverted pyramid, or a cone. I still have the four deficiency levels: Just BE, Be Safe, Be Social, Be Strong; but these don’t take up much of my time. Then there’s the top half of the cone, the growth level: Be Happy (my personal favorite.) This is the part that interests me since it is the only level in which I can find lasting happiness and fulfillment.
When I look at it this way, it truly baffles me how much time, energy, and resources some people are willing to devote to the four lower levels of the pyramid. How much time do you spend on each level?
Continue on to read about the 5 Steps to Finding Fulfillment:
1. Just BE
2. Be Safe
3. Be Social
4. Be Strong
5. Be Happy
Related posts:
Posted in choices, happiness, needs, simplicity
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This was a beautiful post… Thanks!! Happy Wednesday to you
Thanks! Happy Wednesday to you, too! I’m planning to elaborate a little on this topic tomorrow, so stop by if you can!
Lisis
There’s a lot to think about here. This is a good way to look at it, and I’m sure many people could benefit from being reminded, as I have.
I LOVE the picture in this post. It makes me want to be the third person sitting there, enjoying the outdoors, a book, and each other’s company.
You know you are always with us in spirit. =-)
Yeah we get caught up in chasing things that are ultimately meaningless. I think the real way to create happiness is to make the world a better place in whatever way you can. If I focus on that I find the other stuff just sorts itself out eventually.
Hey, Julian! I totally agree with you… let’s make the world a better place.
I just visited your blog and LOVED your about page, especially the part about the mushrooms! =-) I look forward to reading more of your posts tomorrow.
Thanks for stopping by, and don’t be a stranger!
Lisis
Simplify your life is certainly a meaningful choice that can transform your life. You may be interested in exploring the blogs called Zen Habits by Leo Babauta and Think Simple Now by Tina Su. They share a parallel philosophy. Keep inspiring! Writing makes a difference!
Thanks, Liara! I’m definitely a huge fan of Leo’s Zen Habits, but I had not heard of Think Simple Now. I will have to look into that one.
By the way, I just visited your site and LOVE it!! I can’t wait to read through it.
Lisis
Thanks for your contribution to the 177th Carnival of Healing.
There are some wonderful comments accumulating on the original post & you may want to take a look.
Thanks, Pamir! I have really enjoyed reading through all the valuable resources you assembled for that carnival. This was my first blog carnival entry, and it was a wonderful experience.
Thanks!!!
Enjoyed this post Lisis! Fits well with many of my beliefs and practices.
Personally I find the pyramid doesn’t work so well – turning it on it’s head is inspired, I have to say. Works much better that way.
You might be interested in the work of a Chilean economist called Manfred Max-Neef who’s developed a very interesting alternative theory of needs. He basically says there is no hierarchy and we all have all the need at play at the same time. He goes further and has developed model to measure the success of a country in terms of the extent to which it meets the needs of the population. It’s a great alternative to the traditional wealth measures of success.
Ian | Quantum Learning’s latest post… 6 reasons eating vegetarian food is best
Well, Ian… you and I are going to turn conventional wisdom on its head, aren’t we?
Max-Neef’s theory sounds a lot like the concept of Gross National Happiness (from the King of Bhutan.) By either standard, I guess the U.S. isn’t fairing too well these days. We definitely need to redefine our idea of success.
You gotta be the female incarnation of Maslow.
Sunny Jamiel’s latest post… Self-Actualization and Characteristics of Self-Actualized People
That’s what I think too.
[...] read Lisis’ list of Five Steps to Finding Fulfillment with great respect and enjoyment, too. Let’s take a quick look at what she teaches [...]