I found the formula! At least, I knew what it was when I was a child – I just forgot it as an adult.

Thanks for the link! And I’m very jealous that you, Alison and Jay all met up. Did you all match up to the expectations you had before meeting? Any shocks?

@ Stephen: Quality time definitely makes ALL the difference. The other night I spent about 30 minutes doing candle art (extreme candle meditation) with Hunter, and yesterday we sat and built LEGOs together for about the same amount of time. It wasn’t a LOT of time I was spending with him, but it was completely devoted to him… and he noticed. He kept telling me how much he loves doing things with me. We’re always physically in the same house together, but he means WITH my full, undivided attention. Kids notice every little thing.

I find the key is living your values. Opposites attract, but similarities bind. When you live your values, you’re true to you and other people know what to expect. It’s integrity and congruence.

I think where things go south is when we try to fit in situations that really don’t match our values.

J.D. Meier’s latest post… Finding Your Process

Do we think our children benefit from a stressed-out mom who is not the most loving, happy, and fulfilled person she can be? No! Take time for yourself and then be able to give your complete self to others. Quality time is more important than quantity time. People who make this mistake are withholding something from those they share themselves with and that includes your children.

Stephen – Rat Race Trap’s latest post… Harness the Power of Your Subconscious Mind by Changing Your Inner State

@ David: Thank you. I think it’s neat that you recognize the added challenges of juggling kids in the blogger’s mix even though you haven’t gotten to that phase yet. The beauty of this is you can make the most of the time you have all to yourself right now. There are all sorts of wonderful things about being married and being a parent, but it’s best to appreciate the phase you are currently IN. Focus on the positives of your situation. Having said that, the same rule applies to you as to the rest of us: limit your time online so that you focus on the most important things while you are there, and still have time for “real” world activities.

@ Lisa: You raise a very important point about being fully present even when we are not online. When I first started the blog, there was SO MUCH to think about that even when I was not at the computer my mind was still on it. I remember noticing several times that my son would be telling me something about LEGOs or HotWheels for a few minutes, and I would smile and nod, but had NO IDEA what he just said!!! I felt awful because I realized I was not really THERE with him… only my body was. I’ve gotten better about leaving blog thoughts at the computer so that when I’m away from it I can focus on the things going on in Hunter’s or Jeff’s life too.