Why “Follow Your Passion” is Not for Everyone

May 28, 2009

From time to time an individual comes along who has a definitive, identifiable passion… almost an obsession. This passion is an intrinsic part of the person without which that person does not feel complete. Adam Lambert knew from a very young age he wanted to sing and perform for a living. The same goes for many other musicians, dancers, painters, mathematicians, athletes, horse-breeders… all sorts of things. These people love one thing more than anything else in life.

In those cases, I would say, “Follow your passion.” Even if you never get rich, you will be happier doing that activity than if you forego your passion in favor of a lucrative job. So the short answer is: if you have a passion, by all means follow it… see where it leads you. You’ll never know until you try. The risk inherent in this approach is if you cannot do that one thing, finding happiness and fulfillment could prove to be extra challenging for you. Do it anyway.

But most of us are not like that. Even if we had one thing we truly enjoyed or were particularly good at during our formative years, it was probably shaped right out of us by our parents, our teachers, and the school system. Wasn’t their goal always to make us “well-rounded”? If you get straight A’s in one subject, but you’re not doing well in the others, the answer is to spend LESS time on your good subject so you can improve on the others… right? That’s what I always heard anyway. 

I was completely well-rounded by the time I finished high-school… so much so, I didn’t know what to go on to study in college. I was better than average at just about everything, but there was no one thing I excelled in, or loved. The system succeeded with me; I was a Jane of all trades, but master of none. To this day there is nothing I can point to and say, “THAT is my passion… what I want to spend my life doing.” I try different things on for size; some of them stick for a while, some not so much. I would argue this is what happens to most of us.

So, now what?

Many people torture themselves, and agonize trying to FIND their passion. They have heard the same advice I’ve heard, “The key to happiness is to find what you love and go do it.” But they can’t find it. Then they feel like a failure, or a loser, because the search for their one true passion yields no answers! All of a sudden those insidious, self-defeating thoughts roll in, the ones that keep us from enjoying anything at all:

I will never be good at anything.
There’s nothing I was meant to do.
I am doomed to work this miserable job until I die.
I’m such a loser.

Maybe we’ve been focusing on the wrong goal. Instead of trying to find the thing you are passionate about, what if you tried being passionate about the thing you are doing? It was never my dream to teach elementary school; I didn’t even think I was qualified to do it. But then I had to when we decided to homeschool Hunter; it became my reality. So, I threw myself into it and became passionate about doing it well. Now I kinda like it. Maybe trying different things during the different phases of my life IS my passion? Maybe passion is something I just carry with me and apply to anything I do?

I recently read an article about Mike Rowe (of the TV show Dirty Jobs) in Outside Magazine. In it he says:

“Follow your passion” is the worst advice you can give someone. Exhibit A: our 200 dirty jobs – Renee the fish gutter, or the guy who makes flowerpots out of cow shit. Once they found a thing they could make a living from, they figured out how to get great at it and how to love it. If you bring your passion with you, you can apply it to anything that makes sense. If you follow it, you’re going to be miserable until X, Y, Z happens, which might be never.

If you don’t have one thing you are passionate about, consider yourself lucky… you can apply your passion to anything you choose at any given time. You have a nearly endless array of possibilites before you. You don’t need to find or follow your passion; just carry it with you wherever you go.

If you enjoyed this post, please consider sharing it with others.

*

Tuesdays through Thursdays, comments are closed on Quest for Balance (here’s why). Feel free to contact me directly at:

MyQuestForBalance (at) gmail (dot) com.

Or, if you prefer, you can tweet me @Serene_Balance.

Thanks!

(Photo Credit)

Related posts:

1. Net Worth vs. Self Worth: The Passion Paradox
2. Inspiration from T. Alan Armstrong: Become Your Passion
3. The Myth, The Legend: One Passion to Rule Them All
4. OCD: The Pendulum of Caution, Risk, and Reasonable Doubt

Posted in balance, choices, happiness