Road To Freedom Update #1: First Impressions
July 29, 2009
When I announced that we were leaving the rat race with no Plan B, I got basically two reactions from readers. Most are completely excited and happy for us because we’ve escaped the golden handcuffs. But a significant number are worried about the practical realities of this move… how is it actually going to work out? In essence, we have become guinea pigs for others who have considered making such a decision but aren’t sure it is safe to do so.
I hope to chronicle this latest adventure in a few different ways, so as to paint as complete a picture as possible. My first rule is to not spend ALL of my time blogging because I want to be fully present in everything we are going through, rather than buried in my laptop. So, at least during August, my posts won’t be as long, and some of them may just be photos with captions.
The posts I do write about this adventure will likely fall into one of these categories:
Spirit of Adventure: Cool stuff we’re doing throughout our journey.
Real Life Gurus: People I meet who are interesting or teach me something about life.
Road to Freedom Updates: The practical realities of our situation, including emotional and psychological effects.
I don’t think it would be fair to write only about the cool and adventurous things we’re doing because, the reality is, this is a risky decision that is not without uncomfortable consequences. If we are going to live up to our role as guinea pigs, we need to report the good, the bad, and the ugly stuff we’re going through. And if you have specific questions about something I haven’t addressed, by all means, email them to me and I’ll include my answers in the RTF Updates.
So, having established that whole preamble, here’s my first Road to Freedom Update:
1.”Frienemies”
– One of the first things we noticed after Jeff quit his job was a change in the way our friends treat us. I guess it’s because they can’t commiserate with us about how tough and unfair life is, or how screwed we all are by this recession. Maybe they feel we have abandoned them, or they simply can’t relate to us.
For the most part, they find it baffling that Jeff doesn’t know when or where he will start work again, or how much money he will make… it seems like an irresponsible risk to take.
2. Mortgage
– As soon as it was official, I called the bank to talk about my mortgage situation. I wanted to keep them “in the loop” rather than simply stop paying. I was hoping they might let me skip a payment or two and tack it on at the end, to give the house time to sell. They do offer several programs to help owners avoid foreclosure, but I have to be behind on payments first.
So… for the first time in my life, I’m not making my next mortgage payment. It feels really weird because I have astronomically fantastic credit, and used to be an accountant (obsessive about paying bills on time), but… the reality is, we may need that money just to survive so I can’t part with it now.
3. Bill Reduction
– As of August 1, we will have no cable t.v. or land line (will keep the cell phone, and internet). In addition, I will try to put our student loans in deferment. Just these changes will save us about $300 per month. We also need to cut back on electricity (air conditioning in the summer), water consumption, and anything else we can think of. I know at some point we may have to give up internet as well, and use the library or Wi-Fi hotspots, instead.
4. Groceries
- My shopping list changed drastically right away. Now I’m buying more pasta, potatoes, rice, and onions. I know it’s an Atkins diet nightmare, but it’s cheap and will fill us up. I’m also using corn flour and water to make tortillas, then adding beans and produce to make a fairly nutritious and affordable meal.
Basically, I’m shopping and cooking like a Costa Rican now. I even gave up my favorite coffee creamer, and will stick with milk and sugar, instead. Truthfully, I should’ve been doing this all along.
5. Insurance
– A few days after Jeff turned in his notice, he had a bike wreck on the road. He got scuffed up a good bit and slammed his head into the pavement hard enough to crack his helmet. He had a mild concussion, but basically is fine. Mostly what this did was remind us that it could have been much worse. He could’ve suffered a traumatic head injury, or been hit by a car!
Aside from the emotional and psychological “life is fragile” effect this had, it added to our fear of being without medical insurance. For as long as we can, we will keep Hunter on COBRA coverage because of his prior surgeries; but Jeff and I won’t be covered at all. This is a big deal… at least in the States.
6. Sunday Syndrome
– This is what I had started to call that black cloud that appeared in our house every Sunday, as Jeff began to think about going back to work the following day. It is no exaggeration when I tell you that what happened on Sundays was one of the main reasons I wanted him to quit. ANYTHING would be better than repeatedly feeling the weight of that misery in our home.
It wasn’t good for our marriage, our health, or our son. That cloud has completely vanished. Now we are a little nervous, but decidedly NOT miserable anymore. We have some moments of anxiety.. thinking, “What if the savings run out before we find another source of income?” But, by and large, we mostly feel relieved, and happy to be alive.
Bottom Line: If we had this decision to make over again, would we do it? 100% YES
If you have any questions or suggestions, feel free to leave them in the comments, or email me:
MyQuestForBalance (at) gmail (dot) com
Thanks!!!
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Posted in Life, Overcoming Challenges, Road To Freedom Update, about me, anxiety, choices, family, present moment
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Lisis and family,
Know that I wish you all only the best on this journey you’re embarking on. And it’s much more than a journey in your car, down the highway. It’s a journey into “you”, and what life means in that context.
Reading about this originally, I felt this excitement for you on what lies ahead (and I still do!). Reading today, though, really the realities of this sink in. And I think this really shows the commitment you have to this – seeing how life will have to change. It’s not easy to give up something we already have to search for something with more meaning. It can be scary. That’s my take, anyway. Like the insurance thing…
And yet, you’re doing this. That really shows me how committed you are (you as a family) to connecting with life at a much deeper level. And I have the utmost respect for you and what you’re seeking in life.
“The best day of your life is the one on which you decide your life is your own. No apologies or excuses. No one to lean on, rely on, or blame. The gift is yours – it is an amazing journey – and you alone are responsible for the quality of it. This is the day your life really begins.†~ Bob Moawad
Godspeed, my friend…
Lance´s last blog ..Less Stuff, More Meaning
I’m still so happy and excited for you. This is grand adventure, and I’m sure everything will work out fine. Like any great adventure, there will be hard times and difficulties, but the good times will be worth the bad times.
Mainly, I’m just so happy that the “dark cloud” lifted. Left unchecked, it would have continued to grow and become more powerful, eventually invading every aspect of your life. I’m so thankful that you have kicked it out of your life!
We’ll be with you guys every step of the way.
My love to all of you.
Hey Lisis,
I was on this same journey about 1 1/2 years ago. Nobody knew it. I was lucky enough to have put away some “cushion” money while I was making decisions as to how I was going to raise two children and take care of myself. I never documented these emotions. I kept my original blog going…always upbeat until one day I just snapped. I had to close it down. I then opened up the second blog and began to vent more. Since that time I have deleted many of my original post only because I didn’t want to be reminded of my negativity and mental state at the time. If it weren’t for the second blog, and it becoming my best friend for many nights, I’m not sure how I would have weathered the storm.
I feel that blogging can be a huge support for you emotionally during this time. You cannot limit yourself to not having the normal human emotions. This will be tough on you, but in the end …you will come out mentally stronger.
I will keep you in my thoughts and try to be encouragement on the side as much as possible. My lines are always open if you need a friend to talk to. I know I am not around as much these days simply because that is where my new journey has taken me. That is what life is. Just embracing each day whether good or bad. Not dodging them. Standing up for that fight.
Good times will dominate. You will see. I am walking proof of the dark clouds moving on.
Love to you Lisis,
Tammy
Tammy-Cricket´s last blog ..Less than our dreams…
@ Lance: You really do always know just what to say. Your comment made me feel supported and understood, and the quote made me cry! I’m excited about the adventure and scared about the unknowns, more certain and uncertain than I’ve ever been before… simultaneously.
It’s a really weird feeling, but oddly appropriate for this blog as a social experiment. Because, even the best decisions, even the right decisions, often come at a price… there’s no “safe” choice in which everything works out perfectly; there’s always an opportunity cost.. something we must give up in order to make our choice. I have to learn to balance the excitement with the uncertainty, and the freedom gained with the security and predictability lost. It feels a little like a divorce, I suppose.
Anyway, I’m looking forward to sharing the ups and downs with you guys, and so glad you’ll be along for the ride.
Hi Lisis,
I love the fact that you’re going on the adventure. But, as lance said the gravity of the situation is now sinking in. Where there is a will there is surely a way.
I must applaud you and your husband for being so courageous and giving us all the strength to maybe one day have that much determination as you have today.
The Lord works in mysterious ways, and you see, when you will be back from this trip you will surely be Richer than when you left. Inshallah Richer emotionally and monetarily.
But your spirit my dear is simply devine. You are a true inspiration.
I went through this No job phase 2.5 yrs back, as soon as my daughter was born. It took my hubby nearly a year to find what he was looking for. And as i said God really does work in mysterious ways. Infact, so weird i just babbled about it in my post today. I so truly understand the staples part too..the rice ,pulses veggies were our regular diet for quite some time. We actually became healthier:)cutting out all the regular meat etc from our diets.
Waiting for your exciting pictures and posts from the road trip.
Zeenat{Positive Provocations}´s last blog ..Everything Happens For The Best….???
@ Jay: Most of the time, I tend to stay on the “excited about the adventure” track, having faith that things will work out SOMEHOW. I don’t have ANY idea how yet, but I feel comfortable that they will. The not knowing, and not planning every step is a little different, and takes some getting used to. But the possibility of an outcome even more wonderful than I could have possibly imagined or created is very exciting. Gotta have faith, right?
As for that black cloud… it was a KILLER of joy, happiness, hope, dreams, and even romance. It made the air hard to breathe, and casual conversation was nearly impossible. It was always the elephant in the room, and it was inching us out. When you add to that my natural depressive tendencies, I don’t mind telling you, it was becoming unbearable.
It is against THAT backdrop that freedom seems worth the sacrifices we will inevitably have to make. By leaving, we sacrifice security. By staying, we risked our health, happiness, and family. What kind of choice is that?
I really appreciate your constant loving support, my friend.
@ Tammy: I’m so glad you shared that story because I was just having this conversation with a friend yesterday. She was comparing her challenging and frustrating life with what appeared to be the perfect life of a blogger she was reading. I told her we don’t know what that blogger’s life REALLY looks like.. she could just be pretending her life is perfect, for the sake of her readers, or pride, or wishful thinking, or denial. All that glitters is not gold, so we should be real careful what we compare ourselves and our lives to.
I’m so sorry you had to go through your transition mostly alone. This will be my first “public” transition phase, so I don’t know how well that will turn out… but feeling like I have company and support helps me psychologically. I’m hoping it will also give me motivation to keep going when things get extra tough, knowing that I’ll be reporting on it. No one wants to write, “Life got tough and so I quit trying” for all the world to see. Better to say, “Life got tough and I fought back, dammit!!!”
This is what you’ve done… so sent those clouds packing, and I’m so proud of you for it.
Hey Lisis,
I’m not going to say that I’m not worried about how things are going for you. But I will say I wish you and your family all the best in getting out of the rat race for good. As you’ve stated above, most people wouldn’t do what you did. It’s inspiring to me that you’ve decided to take control of how your life turns out. Now, with no avenues for you to go back to, you have no choice but to succeed.
I’ll be reading every post you write from here on.
John´s last blog ..What Comic Book Heroes Can Teach You About Life
I’m excited for you on this adventure. The whole non-attachment issue is something that holds people back from such moves – your spirit soars in your writing and will guide you along. I ditto everything Lance said too! I hope knowing that you have support and encouragement from the blogosphere will accompany you daily.
suzen´s last blog ..Negative Habits that Destroy Relationships & A Tool for Change
Once again, you have this particular knack to boil down really complicated “stuff” while remaining real. This is one of the reasons I am glued to your posts every day. Thanks!!
A particular comment re: â€Frienemiesâ€:
This phenomenon always shocks me, but you’d think I’d (we’d) be used to it by now. So it goes that so many people live in fear.
And, to echo Tammy’s comment, keep blogging on your journey! Having the support of your community will help you a lot; we’ll help you on your way.
@ Zeenat: Thank you for sharing your story here. Knowing others who have been through this sort of transition (and lived to tell about it) is a great source of strength and comfort for me. Your post today was wonderful, by the way… just what I needed to read.
@ John: See… I wasn’t actually scared until YOU said we have nowhere to go back to!
I’m kidding, of course. I like to say that when Jeff turned in his notice we were “Committed to Land”.. pilot speak that means at that point of no return where whatever comes up will just have to be dealt with in the safest way possible. I’m thrilled beyond words to know that you (and others) will be coming along with me.
THANK YOU!!!
@ suzen: That’s pretty much what it comes down to… non-attachment. Although I have certain comforts and outcomes I prefer, I’m open to whatever is meant to happen. There is no “thing” I can’t live without, and whatever change life sends our way will be received with open arms. Having support on this journey makes it that much easier.. and more exciting. Let’s see where this thing takes us, shall we?
@ Lori: You know, that’s been one of my struggles in blogging.. trying to be motivational and inspirational while staying grounded in reality, since real life can sometimes be a bit of a bummer. No one wants to read a blog by Eeyore, they don’t come here to feel depressed and hopeless. But at the same time, I can’t pretend that everything in life is easy peasy and without it’s challenges.
Fact is: life can be tough, but we should do all that we can to enjoy it anyway. And it IS possible to enjoy life even with very real challenges.
Hi Lisis,
Good for you for doing this. As you know, we did the same thing back in 2004. Going to India was one adventure, returning to America was quite another. We lost many friends because of our decisions and the reality of not having a steady paycheck is a hard one. However, it was the best teacher ever in the power of knowing that someway things do work out. When I see you, I will have to tell you stories about this which happened to us.
Even though I am back to work, we live a very simple life and we get flack from family about it. As for health insurance, most states have plans to make sure children are insured if the parents cannot afford insurance. You may want to look into it. Furthermore, as required by law, any hospital has to treat you regardless of whether or not you can pay. Not many people know this, I did not know this until law school. The law is called EMTALA and they have to treat you regardless and many hospitals have to absorb the cost if you cannot pay. Since the majority of the population do not know this, hospitals kick out patients who do not have insurance. That said, you will be fine. If we survived, you will survive. I have no doubt about it.
Plus, I am always here for you (as is Jacob) if you need anything. 
Nadia – Happy Lotus´s last blog ..The Power of Images
One more thing…by you, I mean not only you but Jeff and Hunter too.
Nadia – Happy Lotus´s last blog ..The Power of Images
Good for you for looking at these practical concerns head-on and not deferring them. I think as long as you are this honest and upfront about the challenges involved, you’ll always do the right thing. I think people might get into trouble if they were inclined to avoid looking at some of the trickier parts of it.
I’m very excited for you, this marks a huge step that many aren’t willing to take.
About people’s reactions, I’m experiencing something similar when I tell people I’ve quit my job without anything else lined up. It’s the first thing people ask me when I tell them I’m leaving, “Well do you have something lined up?” No, and I’ll be fine.
This is just the culture we live in, we’re so identified with our jobs, as if they’re internal organs or something.
Thanks for the update and keep them coming.
David Cain´s last blog ..Ethanol Free — 30 Days Without Drugs Update
Thank you, Nadia… you and Jacob have been so amazingly supportive already, and I know you are one giant bundle of unwavering support. It’s amazing how sometimes the people we thought we were closest to will just turn their backs when they can no longer relate to the choices we are making. Maybe it blows their closed little minds, I don’t know… but I DO know it’s their problem and not ours.
We are moving ever forward into uncharted waters, with faith as our compass, to discover what life has in store. Can you imagine what Columbus’ friends must have thought about his decision to sail West to India? Sometimes we’ve just got to go with our instincts and know that something good will come of it… maybe something greater than we can understand or even know about.
I hadn’t heard about EMTALA but you can bet I’ll be studying up on it now. Thanks!
You know, David, that has been a really big part of Jeff’s experience, both this time and when we quit to go to Costa Rica for a year. I think it’s particularly difficult for men. Whenever a guy meets someone for the first time the other person will undoubtedly ask, “So… what do you DO?” As if that one answer defines who you are.
I recently discovered that something similar happens with little boys. When I introduce Hunter to anyone, they ALWAYS ask him what sport he plays, or if he likes baseball, or some other sport. As it happens, Hunter doesn’t play ANY sports, partly because of his surgeries, but mostly because they don’t interest him. When he answers that he plays no sports, the conversation dies… it’s like they don’t have any other pre-rehearsed script to talk to a boy about.
Maybe that’s what is behind the “What do you do for a living?” question. There’s a simple conversation that goes along with anything you answer, except if you answer, “I do nothing.” That requires the other person to be present in the moment and think on their feet… consider the possibilities and implications… and reflect on their own lives in turn.
I don’t know… I’m guessing because I’m not a man, a boy, or a person who asks those inane questions. But I find it interesting nonetheless.
Lisis, The ‘frenemies’ phenomenon is always interesting – why are we (humans that is) so often threatened by lifestyles or decisions different from our own? I think the less secure someone is about their own decisions, the more they react this way. It is like they think your decision is a repudiation of their own decisions for themselves.
I also just wanted to plug gardening as a produce option! I know that’s not realistic while you are on the road, but if you settle in one place, I highly recommend it, if you don’t already do it (which perhaps you do, but it wasn’t mentioned.) I have NO green thumb, and very little plantable space, but we are stocked up on tomatoes, bell peppers and green beans for the summer, based on our first garden. Also, local farmer’s markets are always a deal, and you might even meet some Real Life Gurus at them!
I did have some negative reactions to some of your news, and since you are being honest yourself, in the interest of discussion, thought I would be too. The mortgage and insurance decisions were the big ones for me – that those decisions may impact others, i.e. if you have to default on your mortgage, that feeds into this financial crises, and if you or your husband need medical care, it will probably fall to Medicare. Of course you have been mortgage-paying, tax-paying citizens for decades, so perhaps this is just your due in this society, but it does raise interesting questions about society and the individual for me, and the interconnections of everything and everyone at that level (for better or worse….) – Lisa
Lisa (mommymystic)´s last blog ..Faith and Government – Where’s the Line?
Hey, Lisa! We are definitely planning on having a garden and hooking up with local producers for anything we can’t grow ourselves. I guess I did forget to mention that part.
I want to thank you for bringing up your real concerns because, that’s really the point of living out this whole experiment online… so we can talk about and explore the options and consequences of these types of decisions. It would’ve been simpler, I suppose to just keep posting about abstract subjects until we’ve resolved all the big questions, but this is how we will ALL learn and benefit from the process.
I received a letter from a reader today, which is kind of along these lines. I’ll post it (and my response) tomorrow. But your question is a little more MACRO… how does our personal decision impact society as a whole?
1. Foreclosure: It’s a last resort. Our house is on the market, and if it doesn’t sell, we’ll try to restructure the mortgage so that it is low enough we might be able to rent it out. If both of those fail, we may have to let it go… but we’ll pay a price for it in our credit rating for at least seven years.
2. Insurance: For 60 days after leaving the company, we have the option of purchasing COBRA. Maybe, within that time, he will have found another work situation that affords him benefits. If not, well… it could get complicated. SOME of what we need we could see to in Costa Rica, since they have free universal health care and affordable private health care. But it’s a sticky issue no matter how you look at it.
Either way, staying in our current situation would likely have resulted in major health problems for one or both of us, and even potential marital problems (because that stress and misery can become unbearable). I guess we’re just not willing to risk either one. Having us unhealthy or broken down places an even bigger burden on society, than having us be happy, healthy and productive.
But that’s how it looks from where I’m sitting. I could be wrong. Either way, I am so thankful that you are being honest and coming forward with your REAL thoughts and concerns. Let us ALL learn something from this, if we can.
You know, when we get right down to it, life can be darn scary — regardless of the road taken. There’s always an unseen obstacle around every corner. There’s always a “monster” hidden in the closet. In essence, all of life is a mystery.
We each have a choice. We can try to hide from the mystery by surrounding ourselves with comforters — jobs, baubles, people, dreams, etc — or we can embrace the mystery by accepting it for what it is.
You’ve opted for the latter. The mystery awaits you! : )
Lisis, I’m so glad you took my comment in the spirit you did. I regretted it after writing it, thinking ‘uh-oh I am being a frenemy – what she needs right now is support!’ But your response is great, and I do think your posts will be more interesting if all of us voice our concerns as well – especially since, as you say, this experiment is relevant to many of us considering a similar move down the road. And what makes this especially interesting is that it is linked into so many issues in the public spotlight right now – foreclosures and health insurance among them. Hopefully neither will actually become an issue for you, but it does raise interesting questions about how we live these days, and the other kinds of ‘golden handcuffs’ we have… Namaste- Lisa
Lisa (mommymystic)´s last blog ..Faith and Government – Where’s the Line?
Hi, Rambling Taoist! You, my friend, are absolutely right… life is always a mystery. We just THINK we have it all figured out and safely squared away sometimes, but life knows better. Challenges and surprises always happen, so rather than fear them and guard against them, we’ve chosen to embrace them.
It thrills me to have a “Rambling Taoist” visiting my site. I’d like to become a rambling Taoist myself one day!
Lisa, I am so proud of you for openly and honestly voicing your concerns… someone had to lead the way so we can get some real conversation going. The decision has now been made, and I have enjoyed all the support I’ve received from readers. But what I really need, what WE really need, is not so much a big cheerleading party, but to have REAL conversations about the realities we are facing.
It is BECAUSE of the macroeconomic situation that our options today are far more limited than ever before. Believe me, we would’ve preferred a safer route. But sometimes there isn’t one. So many people I know feel trapped and hopeless, completely devoid of joy or a sense of purpose. And generally, it’s not because of anything THEY did wrong. They all crossed their t’s and dotted their i’s, but the system still fell apart.
So, now what do we do?
Do we sit and wait for someone to fix it so that we can keep playing by the rules we learned in grade school? Maybe. Do we jump off the sinking ship and start swimming towards the shore? Perhaps.
I don’t know. But we need to at least start TALKING about these things. So THANK YOU for opening up and sharing your thoughts here. Honesty is always welcome at Q4B.
Hi Lisis,
I am going to jump into the issues that Lisa (Mommy Mystic) raised and I think her method was full of compassion which I think is so awesome. I just wanted to share my thoughts.
When we came back from India, many in my family were concerned that we had no work and no benefits. Our initial plan was to adjust to American life for a couple of weeks and begin our search. Many in family could not be patient and all kind of chaos began. Fear of not having a job and having no insurance scared them so much more than it scared us. They were afraid we would come to them for money and that never was the case. I was disowned by many in my family. To make a very long story short, we got back on our feet in two months and we learned the greatest lesson of all which is faith.
I am not talking religious faith but a knowing that life has a way of getting things in order when you do your part and just let go. My family freaked out for no reason. Nothing happened along the way and we never asked for a penny. There are no guarantees in life. People who play it safe are never guaranteed security. Actually, there is no such thing as security. Life can change in an instant.
Please know that I am not endorsing being irresponsible. I am just saying that when a person feels guided to just find another way, life has a way of taking care of things in ways you can never imagine. I have experienced it and I know countless others who have experienced. Eventually, we all have to learn that on some level we will be okay. The key is being true to where you are and living with integrity.
Nadia – Happy Lotus´s last blog ..The Power of Images
Hey Lisis, your road to freedom is already intersecting the road my wife and I have been on for a little while. We both gave up good-paying (but stressful) teaching jobs in China, moved to the USA, and now both work kinda blue collar jobs (UPS Store) for fairly low pay. We have pretty limited insurance for disasters — no coverage for small stuff, etc. Groceries have to be mostly fresh, simple stuff because 1) frilly, already prepared food tends to be too expensive and 2) my wife is Chinese and prefers to cook her own style of food. Etc, etc, etc.
It is a bit scary sometimes, but it is also nice to be some distance from the rat race.
I wouldn’t trade this life for anything, really — the security you’re giving up (and the security I haven’t had since leaving my teaching job) really didn’t exist anyway. Most people THINK it does, but that security tends to suck the life out of you by making you stand still. You know what else is still, rigid, and unmoving? A corpse. As Tibetan master Dudjom Rinpoche said, we are like living corpses. You’re taking steps out of the land of the dead, and into the land of the living — keep at it!
Thomas Hochmann´s last blog ..40th Anniversary of Apollo 11
Hola mi amiga
…I really just want to wish you luck on your epic journey…this is going to be an amazing growing experience for you and your family…You will need courage to go into the unknown. In the beginning all your fears will come to the surface, the only way to move ahead and accept your fears is through courage. To be a courageous person you will need to leave your analytical mind and live with your heart….keep reaching for the stars my friend and always remember “pura vida”….
How To Make The Leap Into The Unknown
“Wandering re-establishes the original harmony which once existed between man and the universe†~Anatole France
Ivan´s last blog ..The Power of Enthusiasm
You kids are gonna wear my wrists and fingers out tonight! I’d better keep my responses brief, so I can still type my blog posts (and eat my Ben & Jerry’s)!
Nadia: I will definitely stay true to who I am and do my very best to live with integrity.
Thomas: I’m so thrilled you stopped by, you just have NO idea! Welcome to my second home!! Actually, it’s soon to be my ONLY home. I’m thrilled to know more about your UPS story… I’ve been wondering about the “box whisperer” part of your twitter bio. Oh, and it’s a rare treat to get a comment with the words “corpse” and “Tibetan master” at the same time.
Ivan: Eeeeek!! There you are, my friend… straight from Paradise! I’ve definitely had to switch gears from relying on my mind to relying on my heart… connecting with that Costa Rican side of me. Pura Vida!!
Lisis, thanks for the link love!
I am so proud of you and I can’t express it enough. You and Jeff are in my thoughts and I am convinced this is the right thing. You may have struggles and doubts along the way, but unlocking the cuffs and freeing yourselves makes you #1 in my book.
I will be eagerly following along!
Stephen – Rat Race Trap´s last blog ..The Power of Less – Identify the Essential
Hi Lisis.
You cannot stand with one foot in one world and with one in the other.
To let the universe co-create your dreams you need to let go of the predictable course otherwise your life will only be lived half heartedly.
I have taken the plunge of leaving a career with no money stashed away 7 years ago. It has been an interesting journey and not always easy as at times it has freaked me out when I kind of felt like walking on an exciting path with zero visibility.
But as I said, these experiences cannot be lived with jumping off the cliff while hanging on with one hand. I have not regretted one bit what I have done as my mind could have never come up with this adventure. It has been the desires from my heart, adding value to life that has guided this wonderful life very well, better than my mind could ever have. In hindsight it has been astounding what has happened so far.
You go well, you will with these best guides you are calling upon. You will see and so will we.
wilma ham´s last blog ..How mother and daughter manage the fear driven corporate world.
What I’ve learned in my own life is that after the initial shock of a new environment or life change it usually doesn’t take much time to adjust to a new way of living.
Bakari´s last blog ..Nicholas Cage, Predicting the Future and why Problem Solving is not the key to Success
@ Stephen: You’re welcome… that was a great article. I really appreciate your support and enthusiasm!
@ Wilma: So right. Some people like to live life like they’re on the monkey bars at a playground… hang on tight to one rung until the next is firmly grasped. I guess I aspire to be more of a trapeze artist… gotta let go of where I’ve been to get to where I’m going.
@ Bakari: I certainly expect there will be an adjustment phase, when we may question our decision. But beyond that, I think we’ll settle into a nice groove in life.
YOU WILL WIN. It’s battle .. a battle to ‘know thyself’ .. a battle against the so called ‘golden handcuff’ ( the phrase so poisedly coined by you).
YES !! YOU WILL WIN.
sajal nandy´s last blog ..QUICKPOST: NO SHORTS IN THE MOUNTAIN
Thank you, my friend (and most ardent cheer leader)! I love that phrase too, but I actually borrowed it from Stephen at Rat Race Trap. But either way, it’s time to be rid of those things!
I’m in awe of your courage, Lisis – you and your husband! I know what it’s like to cut back to the essentials, and while it’s tough, you’ll be fueled by your passion for life. Keep up the great attitude!
Leo´s last blog ..Two Questions to Help You Gain Perspective
Thanks, Leo! I sure do appreciate you stopping by and lending your support. It should be an exciting journey because, when we pare down to the essentials, we find out what we are really made of. Gotta keep that passion… what’s life without it?
You can be sued by your mortgage company if they find that you are able to pay but choose to miss payments. Go ask a lawyer like myself.
Hey, John! I appreciate the tip. I actually called the mortgage company and ASKED them what I should do. I told them we are now without income and feel we should skip a payment while we figure out what is going to happen, and they could add it on to the end of the mortgage. They said they have programs to help me restructure the mortgage, but only once I’m behind on my payments.
They can’t do anything for me while I’m current. So, I called them ahead of time, told them my situation, let them know who the house is listed with, and at what price, and said that I can’t pay right now until I know if we will have money for food and basics.
“Able to pay” is a pretty loose term. If I have $1000 in checking I am technically able to pay, but once I do, we won’t have money left to eat. Where do you draw the line? Who decides?
But there’s no mystery for them to “find out” since I have told them everything already… and posted it here. I’m not hiding anything, and I’m not trying to get away with anything. We’re just trying to make our way in this world like everyone else. Maybe what they could do instead, is be humane and try to work with me during this transition.
Having said that, I don’t really expect them to be merciful. I’ll gladly take your advice and look into my options a little further.
Thanks!!!
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