Adventure: How to Get From Fear to Faith
September 21, 2009
Typically, the decisions we make are fear-driven. We usually make safe, conservative, predictable choices, rather than take a chance and rely on Faith.
What if we tried a different approach?
For instance, when we were deciding where to move to next, the “safe” choice was Upstate New York, where my mom grew up. My uncles still live there, so they could help us with the transition. One uncle even offered Jeff a job!
If we moved there, we would have a known income, family and friends to lean on, and a fairly simple transition. But, we would not be staying true to who we are.
Jeff and I are hippies (at heart) and in search of a livelihood we can be passionate about. For him, that probably means something to do with outdoor adventures and gear. For me, it will be about helping others in creative ways.
Vermont suits our adventurous, spiritual, non-conformist style, but requires a leap of Faith. We have no family there, and don’t know where our income will come from (or if we can survive the winters). The outcome of our move to Vermont is completely unpredictable. We have no idea how this is going to turn out… but our decision is Faith-based.
We aren’t settling, we aren’t taking the easy route, we aren’t relying on others to take care of us. THIS time, we are setting fear aside and surrendering to Faith. I don’t know how things will work out, but I feel certain they will.
I read a Goethe quote on Happy Lotus recently along these lines:
“The moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings, and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way.”
I believe great things are possible and that we will encounter and create all sorts of interesting opportunities. I’m not saying it’s a walk in the park… ’cause it isn’t. We have very real moments of very real fear… worries about all the possible “What if?” scenarios.
But when those moments happen, we just notice them, breathe, and keep going. We no longer give in to them. Sometimes we take turns being The Pessimistic Worrier or The Perpetual Optimist; either role can get tiring after a while. But overall, we are both optimistic and committed to our goal of creating a fulfilling life we are passionate about.
So, how do we do this? How do we get from Fear to Faith?
Two steps have us well on our way:
1. Forget Fear
Not long ago I wrote a post called, “Why Worry? Avoiding Feelings of Stress, Anxiety and Helplessness,” describing a scenario in which all of my worry and concern did not affect the outcome one bit. The bottom line is, fear-related feelings don’t help us get to where we are going. They may help us avoid getting mauled by a tiger in the jungle, but… when was the last time you were in that situation? In our normal lives, fear is a bit of an over-kill reaction to our daily problems.
I was recently reminded (by Nadia) that worry is completely useless. The Plan is The Plan no matter what we think or do about it. Whatever is intended for our lives will come to pass, one way or another. Worrying will not change the outcome, it will only affect our experience of the journey. You can enjoy the ride, or you can panic through it… but it’s the same ride either way. Might as well enjoy it, right?
2. Find Faith
OK. You know you’ve been acting out of Fear and you now want to have Faith, but how do you do that? Faith in WHAT, for crying out loud?! I know some fundamentalists are going to have a heart attack over what I’m about to say but… what you believe is not as important as that you believe in something.
If you have a particular religious background, now is the time to get in touch with those beliefs, understand them, embrace them, and have faith in God. If you are spiritual but non-religious, know that the everything in the universe happens for a reason… just look at Nature for countless examples of patterns and plans that WE did not come up with.
If you are neither spiritual nor religious, then consider that 99% of the time, things work out fine in the end (1% of the time you may be camping next to tigers in the jungle, cursing me for teaching you to ignore your fear). Most of the time, no matter how dumb our choices, life kind of works itself out… believe me, I know.
Perhaps you could start trusting that you are capable of good decisions, you are able to do a great many things, you have skills, talents, gifts or knowledge that can help you get to where you are going, and you are not likely to end up completely destitute no matter what you choose. You can always correct your decisions as you go.
You can even believe that little green elves will pave the way for you to succeed, if that is what it takes for you to let go of the fear and start believing that anything is possible. Start seeing challenges as minor distractions, instead of deal-breaking barriers. You will be far more productive if you can Remain Calm in Stressful Situations… by having Faith.
What about you?
Are your decisions fear-driven, or Faith-based? Are you choosing safety at the expense of authenticity? Are you creating a fulfilling life you are passionate about?
Thanks!
PS: We signed a lease on a place in Waterbury, Vermont… the very same day that our renters signed their lease here (in Georgia)! Coincidence? 
Related posts:
- Why Do You Fear Being Great, You Yellow-Bellied Coward?
- Faith, Patience, and Your Moment in the Sun
- Adventure: Starting Over
- Adventure: Frolicking in Vermont’s Stick Season
- Forget Resolutions, Live for Today
Posted in Life, Spirit of Adventure, choices
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Very true what you say about knowing what to do and then doing it.
But it is the not knowing WHAT to do that can keep us back.
Once the way is clear all blocks just drop away as you say.
Worry is interesting isn’t it. What a total waste of time and completely useless preoccupation.
It can make us sick.
Good on you for the leap of faith, I have taken a few and they are always awesome experiences.
It does always work out, but how can it not?
I wish you well in your new home and life. You will succeed.
Cheers
Brigid
brigid´s last blog ..THE 12 STEP GUIDE TO COPING WITH BEING AT PEACE in the 21st CENTURY
So very true, Brigid. When I wrote my Road to Freedom Update #3, I had NO idea what it was we were supposed to do… where to move? IF we should move at all? I felt like all the signs were pointing me in circles. At that moment, what I needed was Patience. I guess that’s the first building block.
Don’t get too frustrated if you are still uncertain of your path. When you get frustrated and desperate and anxious and stressed, you narrow your focus and close yourself off from possibilities. As Nadia said, in the end, everything will turn out as it was meant to, but your experience of it will be awful.
Alternately, if you can be patient and aware, soon enough some answers will start to feel better than others. And once you’ve chosen a path, the universe will shuffle itself to clear your way. When we are still, and think about what really matters to us, the answers that are right for us are easier to see (even if everyone else thinks we’re crazy!).
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Being stuck as I am right now, paralyzed by fear, I’m probably the least-qualified person to comment today. BUT I just wanted to take the time to thank you and Jeff for pointing the way, and for giving me (and others like me) hope and courage that things will work out fine. You guys are really brave, and I’m sure that you’ll find a way to make it work. I’m so proud of you, and am cheering you on constantly!
Jay Schryer´s last blog ..God is Play-Doh
Hey Lisis, great piece.
I agree so much, I gave you some linkin’ from me blog as well.
Faith is really important, and I think it is a failing of our modern lifestyle that faith continues to be eliminated from how we live. Part of the problem is that we seem to invest our lives in things that are distinctly anti-faith: credit card debt, jobs that are safe but not satisfying, etc.
I was talking with a friend the other day about college. We both agreed that it’s a regrettable aspect of life in the USA that college is shoved down every student’s throat, from kindergarten up to 12th grade. It’s forced on students as the One True Way(tm) that everybody must conform to, as a guaranteed formula for success, riches, and hot blonde babes joyriding in your Corvette. And yet it doesn’t suit everybody, and doesn’t guarantee success or happiness for everybody. Sometimes, forcing that safe, “easy route” on people actually harms them — they start living for the formula, rather than living for who they really are.
Thomas´s last blog ..From Fear to Faith
In line with your Goethe quote is this from Thomas Carlyle: “Doubt of any kind is ended alone by action.”
Sweet post, Lisis! Your adventures are always exciting to hear about.
As you know, my decisions aren’t based on fear, but on faith (and partly frustration). I wholeheartedly believe that I can achieve almost anything if I put my mind to it. If I fear anything, it’s living a life meant for an “employee” (constantly worrying of bills, going to work when someone else wants me to, telling my wife and kids that I can’t buy them things or take them places because the “begging for a bonus” routine didn’t work this year).
I feel as if these adventures, this blog, knowing you, and knowing everyone here, was meant to be. I’ve got the inspiration I want to turn my dreams into reality.
Keep on truckin’ Lisis!
John´s last blog ..My First Steps Towards Lifestyle Design
@ Jay: I wouldn’t say you are paralyzed by fear… I think you are just still in the Uncertainty phase… patiently waiting for clarification. But I believe you are getting closer to knowing in your heart of hearts what is right FOR YOU. Once you know, without a doubt, you will have to act on it. Any other choice will leave you feeling unhappy and unfulfilled. At that moment, you will shed the Fear and turn to Faith. I’m sure of it.
@ Thomas: Thank you so much for the post on your blog, and for bringing up the point of everyone being forced into one path. Even our decision to homeschool Hunter sometimes feels a little crazy because “most” people don’t go that route. But I KNOW deep down it’s the best path for us… for the way he learns, for our nomadic lifestyle, for my desire to be a part of his learning adventure. There is no One True Way that works for everyone. I think forcing ourselves to stay on that path is almost a sure way to remain unhappy.
@ Paul: Absolutely! About the worst thing we could do is sit around and mull it over in our heads indefinitely. Once we know what feels right for us, it is time to act. Action will be the catalyst to start removing fear.
Hi Lisis,
The first thing really grabbing hold of me here is the Goethe quote, and especially the word “providence”. It reminds me so much of the song “Held”, by Natalie Grant. And that whole word, between this quote and song – really stirs up in me this belief in faith. Faith. In trusting something you can’t necessarily see.
Do I have faith? I do. The thing is, do I sometimes let fear win out over faith? Definitely. As much as I believe in a Higher Source, in that if I”m doing as my heart speaks to me – sometimes it can still be difficult to make that leap…to faith.
You help me. Seeing you, doing this – daily. Living in faith. It is inspiring. And I know there are moments when it’s probably difficult. And then there are moments that feel completely freeing. Lisis, don’t stop what you’re doing. Your faith gives others (me) more belief in living out life as it’s meant to be….
Lance´s last blog ..Laughter Revisited
Thank you for this reminder – beautifully written!!
Fear can be so debilitating.
@ John: I definitely believe everything is meant to be. It’s like the old saying, “When the student is ready, the master appears.” Not that I’m a master of any sort, but I know many of my readers are fabulous teachers. This whole community, and what it represents, have been brought into your life at a time when you can appreciate the lessons… when you are receptive to the idea of endless possibilities. I am so excited to see where YOUR adventures will take you!
@ Lance: Sometimes we all give in to Fear… at least for a while. It’s inevitable. I don’t think it would be normal to take giant leaps of faith and NOT feel some fear. The trick is not to surrender to the Fear, don’t let it paralyze you into inaction. Notice it, feel it, acknowledge it (that it sucks!), and then keep going on the path you know to be right.
As for your last paragraph… that means the world to me, especially when you said, “SEEING you, DOING this.” Lately I’ve been thinking about how great it would feel to be a Wayne Dyer or Marianne Williamson… these spiritual guides that teach us so much with their books, their speeches, their workshops, etc. But I don’t feel I’m one of “those” people (the uber gifted authors and orators). Trying to be that way feels like I’m a kid again, walking around in my mom’s high heels… clumsy, awkward, silly.
What I CAN do is teach or inspire by example. I won’t always have the right words, or the most effective presentation, but I can throw myself into what I believe. I can model faith, compassion, kindness and love in my own life, so a few people can see it IS possible… it DOES work… there is ALWAYS hope. I may not be able to explain it, but I can SHOW you how it feels, and maybe some of you will be inspired.
Hi Lisis!
I LOVED this post! It is almost as if Fear and Faith are both sides of the same coin when it comes to our journey. The only thing is the sides are really a choice we make. Big one here, this choice! The world is flush with critics. One can grow weary of the constant judgment we receive seemingly over the most joyous of our decisions. Hold fast to yours!
suzen´s last blog ..I’m Alive! Celine Dion and Great Inspiration
Congrats on not taking the more secure road and choosing the road “wanting wear”, the one less travelled by:
It reminds me of the Robert Frost poem, “The Road Not Taken”
http://www.bartleby.com/119/1.html
Miche
Heya Lisis
Great post, it’s all about facing your fears, because it’s often not as scary as it seems.
One thing I can give as an example is when I was a kid (15 or so) I always used to go to the university swimming pool with my buddy, and they had 3 diving boards at various levels (1m,3m and 5m). The 1m and 3m were pretty easy and not scary, but I found the 5m scary. I was okay with just jumping off it, but even then when I stood on the edge and looked down it made me not want to jump.
I really wanted to dive off the 5m board, but this was super scary for me, and every time I would chicken out because I would look down and imagine what would happen if I land wrong or break my neck or whatever. Then one day I just did it, climbed up to the board, didn’t even look down, and just ran as fast as I could to the end and dived in head first.
It went perfectly and pretty effortless. Amazing how you can be so scared of something until you try it.
Congrats for taking the plunge and living life how you want to live it
Cheers
Diggy – Upgradereality.com´s last blog ..5 Ways to Energize your Life
I love hippies at heart. I’m familiar with the quote and it’s proved true over and over in my own life. It’s so clear why you can’t go where it’s safe. It would be the swimming against a current. That’s no way to live life. I think we should all go shout it from the rooftips, “Look what they’re doing! Get off the pity pot and join them!”
Loving how this is all coming together. Vermont is SO beautiful in the Fall, I guess you probably know that already, but if not, the leaves changing just cannot be beat. I used to drive up there from NYC every Fall with friends when I lived in NY, just to spend a weekend in it. Not sure if you are a Hobbit/Lord of the Rings fan, but I always thought of Lothlorian – the golden-leafed elf forest. So I hope you will make it there in time for that.
Anyway, fear vs. faith, this is the crux of it, isn’t it? Well, I already shared my scuba-diving with sharks story, so you know overcoming fear has been a big theme for me too. At the moment I am dealing more with inner fears than big, external ones, and inner changes rather than big external life ones, but I think it goes in phases for each of us. It is inspiring to see you acting on your faith, and overcoming fear.
Lisa (mommymystic)´s last blog ..Musings on PEACE, in Honor of International Peace Day
Hi Lisis,
To be honest, I think I sometimes stop myself because I either don’t want to cause myself pain or because I don’t want to lose what I’ve worked so hard for thus far.
The odd thing, though, is that those times that I have ignored my pain or loss avoidance tactics, great things have happened. I believe in what you and Jeff are doing. Huge kudos!
The Goethe quote you noted gets to the hear of it, for me anyway. I love that quote! Great post here today, Lisis.
Lori´s last blog ..Nature is Music
Hi Lisis,
First of all, thank you for mentioning me twice. I am so honored.
As you and I have talked about many times, living on faith is the way to go. You know my past story so need to rehash it here. What I will say is that as a result of having no where to live and very little money, I learned about faith and that is how I live my life.
Fear does raise its ugly head now and then but then I tell it to shut up and it does.
Fear is just an illusion – a very powerful illusion. However, nothing can triumph over love and faith, in essence, is love in action.
Nadia – Happy Lotus´s last blog ..The September Issue of My Life
From my thoughts to Jay’s fingers…or so it seems anyways, since he wrote exactly what I was thinking.
So, ditto what he said. Plus…
Thank you for being an inspiration, for showing us how to live our lives authentically and for even putting that bug in our ear that we, too, can live this way!
This post is going to be staying on my mind; intermixing with parts of Stephen’s post from The Rat Race Trap, “Is It Time for a Quantum Leap?”, that have already been playing in there.
“The how of the quantum leap isn’t obvious or you would have done it already. Let go of your limiting beliefs.”
and
“Break out of your routines. Find something new, something completely different. Your routines will keep you where you are at. What’s working now is what keeps you on your current plane. If you want to make a quantum leap you have to do something different, something improbable.”
and
“You can’t figure it all out ahead of time. You have to take a leap and make adjustments as you go. It’s going to be ambiguous and chaotic. It’s going to be wild, fun, and scary all at the same time. I’m a big believer in just doing and then figuring it out as you go.”
Suzanne´s last blog ..The Power of My Choice
Hi, everyone! I’m super busy today, calling utilities, packing, finding a U-haul, all that good stuff. ONE WEEK! That’s how long I have to get this done. Eeek!
I just wanted to let you know that I am checking in here throughout the day, reading comments, and really appreciating all the support. Diggy, thanks for sharing your diving story… that was a perfect example of how fear can be such an over-reaction sometimes.
Lisa, am SO looking forward to the golden-leafed elf forest. That’s the reason we are rushing to get up there by October 1. I figure, the longer I have there in the splendor of Fall, the more inspired I will be to “put up with” the long winter.
Hi Lisis, isn’t it great to live a glorious life AND to be of service as a rolemodel.
You rock and go girl go.
Fear is a mind game, not useful and paralyzing.
Fright is good, an in the now reaction to the tiger next to your tent and very solution focused and very useful.
AND what I have found, when confronted with a fright, it is amazing how then the mind becomes a very clever thing and finds solution you would have never dreamed of in your arm chair.
When it is focused on fear it is a dumb obsessed old maid and to be ignored.
So relax, DO and you will find the solutions. THAT is learning to experience faith.
Faith is something you need to learn to appreciate like wine. Nobody likes the first sip of wine, nobody likes the first sip of faith but when you learn to appreciate it then you will love it.
Oh this is so exciting.
Lots of love, Wilma
wilma ham´s last blog ..The benefits of doing completion.
This post is just wild Lisis! 3 1/2 years ago I took a leap of faith and moved to Vermont (away from my home of 36 years) with my husband, 2 boys, and another baby on the way. We moved in with my inlaws for what we thought would be a 6 month or less stay. We ended up living with them for 2 years while we saved for a house and finally with baby number 4 three months from being born we found our total dream house. A 1200 foot farm house on 3 acres with apple trees, mature maple trees for sugaring, and even a pocket door for our bedroom (a favorite feature of my husbands). As someone who always liked to be in “control” this move and leap was an utterly life changing experience. I know surely that I would not have gotten through it without a mindful relationship with God and yes the Bible. I’ve learned to let so much go. I’ve learned that stuff (all the stuff we stored away for 2 years) really isn’t important. We still have our struggles, but I really see them now as ways to shape me into the person I am meant to be. When money is scarce I feel so much more compassionate to those who have less. I love the song that goes “I’m just an old lump of coal dear Lord, but I’m gonna be a diamond some day”. I think of it often when I am fearful…makes me realize that challenges have a rightful place in our lives.
So happy you are leaping!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Look me up when you get to Vermont!
Fear is definitely a great obstacle in attaining our full capacities. What you have expressed here is a must in order for us to explore many hidden possibilities. Fear has its benefits, but we must not allow it to control our destinies.
Faith is a powerful and divine virtue.
Walter´s last blog ..How to unleash your true capacity
Last year I knew I wanted to quit my high-paying corporate job to write my first book. I was afraid like you wouldn’t believe. So afraid, in fact, that I held onto that job until it was so uncomfortable for me I had no choice but to let it go. I was told to take a leap of faith, and things would work out. Luckily I knew I had a built-in safety net beneath me, in case things got really dicey, but I’d never needed a safety net before, so even THAT made me fearful. I did it anyway – left the job, and since then, my life has unfolded in miraculous ways. I still have days of worry, though, but I love what you said here, “Worrying will not change the outcome, it will only affect our experience of the journey.”
I trust that my life’s plan is mapped out, and as long as I keep staying in touch with my gut, the next right move will present itself.
I saw this affirmation on another blog and love it, “God please show me the way today, and give me the resources to follow that way.”
Vermont sounds lovely, and if it’s calling your name, there’s probably a very good reason. But you might not know it until you get there!
Sending positive energy your way!
Megan “JoyGirl!” Bord´s last blog ..Feeling Prosperous
F A I T H = Finding Answers In The Heart
Jared´s last blog ..The Secret Power of Gratitude and How to Get It
Very thoughtfull post on overcoming fear .It should be very much helpfull
Thanks,
Karim – Creating Power
Hi, everyone! Just a short note here before I start the day’s business of packing. I can’t possibly express how much I appreciate all these comments. I especially love hearing your personal stories and experiences with times of overcoming your fears. Every bit helps, and I’m sure I’ll be looking back on these at those times when worry wants to creep back in.
Jared, Finding Answers In The Heart is beautiful. Thank you!
Hi Lisis
You are truly such an inspiration and I have so many experiences in my own life today in moving from fear to faith.
Fear paralyzes, faith keeps us moving forward and it is thanks to that, that I am grateful for being where I am today. I feel I have taken a huge leap of faith in the last few months leaving behind my own job and going to live a two income life on one income. And like you I don’t regret it one bit!
The journey just keeps getting better and better
Evita´s last blog ..The Winner of The Path: Afterlife DVD & Your Thoughts On Death and the Afterlife
Hi Lisis,
Well, this is some sort of serendipity…I wrote a very similar article, also using the fabulous Goethe quotation….
It all starts with releasing fear!
Thanks for a great article.
k
Kaushik´s last blog ..Finding Passsion and Purpose: The Tipping point in the fulcrum of change
This is an AMAZING POST!
Do you recommend easing into this system laid out or going big at first? I know most people have lived fear-based lives.
Nazim Khimani´s last blog ..Stop numbing yourself from your true feelings
Beautiful and important post. Faith can move mountains and changes the course of human events. We are spiritual beings and connecting with our faith opens new doors for us. I know you and Jeff have a wonderful meaningful life. Continue to follow your heart and have faith. Trying to be safe has influenced some of the worst career decisions of my life. Take a risk. Great wisdom. Blessings to you.
Thank you so much for this post. I’m currently pursuing the transition from fear to faith and your words are so straightforward and encouraging. I look forward to reading more!
Daphne´s last blog ..Willingness to Fail
Gosh, Lisis, what a great piece. And what’s really great about is that you are not “a guru” preaching this stuff from a position of wealth and celebrity, but an ordinary mum and wife following her heart.
I feel so stuck at the moment, so afraid of not achieving my dreams, I feel deaf and blind to the world and its messages and have no idea which way to turn. The fear prevails – for income, for security, for a roof over my head, for food on the table, for my children’s well-being. I wish I had such faith as you do, whenever I start believing that “things always work out”, they don’t, another disaster strikes. I kind of see where I want to be, how I want to be, but I don’t know what the first step should be.
Hi, everyone! Sorry I’ve lagged on comment replies, but I’m in U-Haul loading mode today (start the drive tomorrow!).
Dorothy, I just want to tell you that I totally feel your pain. You are absolutely right in that I am not a guru, and I am not sharing stuff I’ve read or heard about. I am LIVING through this complete uncertainty, facing many of the same risks that others do right now. We have no job, and hope to find or create one in “this economy”. We are spending our last bit of savings to move to a state we’ve never lived in, and where we don’t have any family. We have no medical insurance now (today was our last day to elect COBRA… and we can’t afford it.)
Sometimes, a bunch of “disasters” strike in a row. I went through several years when it felt like things just kept getting worse and worse… my parents crashed their plane, my mom died, my dad ended up paraplegic and bipolar, my friend shot himself, then my son needed surgery (all while I was dealing with depression). It felt like it was JUST TOO MUCH for any soul to bear. I really thought I would shatter in a million pieces.
But I didn’t.
I don’t know how, but I got through all that… and I can’t say that it was faith that got me through it then. I white-knuckled my way through it. Looking back, I wish I had eased up, and trusted that at some point everything would be well again. My fear, worry, stress and anxiety only made the difficult times worse for me. Whatever we are going through, it will pass. So if Faith is hard to come by, at least cultivate Patience. Maybe that will help you get through to the other side.
Huge Hugs!!!!!